~Death~

One can hardly intervene but never supervene this abject of a phenomenon called death. One cannot align the ladders to the most perfect ascent but can, at utter ease jump to the conclusion, the conclusive victory over a life long episode of struggle and coercion. 
We, humans patronise the concept of continuity more than what makes us , us – humanity. This very insight is laid well and firm even in a newborn, as a birth, an initiation of life gives hope for its continuity and acceptance as the ultimate truth. And right in the middle of a well thought, dream canvas of life, streaks through death, and all of a sudden snatches every mortal attention to the gaping rent in the finesse of a fabric. Bewildered.What stood there just a moment ago, unquestionable and true, with a well spun connection with every possible element of life, has in a moment slipped into an even bigger reality of oblivion. And the onlooker, finds being framed in time, flabbergasted in self-contradictory. For a moment, as I shifted glances trying to check out the ugly-rents in the most perfect canvas, i found it to be utterly pitted and scar-ragged, that nothing is as perfect.

The never ending desire of finding something in the void got the better of me. Adoring those rents the terrible darkness bemused me beyond comprehension. The ever stretching borders of nothingness, with its own share of magnanimity continued casting its spells, enchanting me to believe in what is untrue, and the rigorous ascent continues.If death were revered,then there would have been a point in finding its meaning, and that if true is because of the existence of life.

There awaits the death,

Stealing glances coy, with stealth

Playfully it often scampers,

Stalls alongside, asit whispers!

With an enthralling murmur,

And a company of blue kisses,

Making it hard to decipher

If it punishes or actually blesses!

When one self is confined in the negation of death, it becomes veritably intractable to extract an optimistic approach at life. The fact of life being in existential crisis sans death becomes hard to understand and the big leap from the ladder props up as the only available option- suicides. That in due course of time he will be comfortably peeled off the ladder and that being the ultimate option for all and sundry is forgotten.

And speaking of interventions, the descent in either of the aspects is too unpredictable to be intervened by either psychiatry or medicine.it doesn’t obey your interventions. It is audacious enough to bedeck its own course, with an uproar of confidence.

And more so,

“Why succumb to the temptation of dread, when you can live death, and well beyond it…!”
~Shubham(8/5/17)

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Words, never realised !

There lay the verse,

The verse resembling infinity.

Of words untold,

Forbidden, once by the weight of time,

Or simply cast off, claiming

A jugglery of jargons!

And yet again, relieved

In the voyage of moments.

To be let free, and be free,

To outlive the rest

And live on carefree!

Beyond the race of time

To somewhere unbound

Not hemmed in the regular chime,

Never as easy to be found!

Tracing the rhythm,

For a soul to attune with…

the words coyly meant,

Most ignored, while some faked

Claiming it an alien accent!

~Shubham(April 15,2017)

~The glass facade~

There wasn’t the rain

She always sought,

As thunder stole the shower away

Clapping in the canvas aloud!

There, she never broke a vow,

Waiting behind the unkempt curtains;

As the murmurs of a rustic wind

Sneaked in along the glass fence!

For you alone, I ride the storm,

For you, I thrive to sing

Said the tired, dainty raindrop

On the way to her, glistening!

When she meets the mutual heart,

Will it come and bid her part?

To bind her loveless, and delude

Of the descent from gentle to rude!

Clad in the harmony of life,

As wind bellows a sombre;

And the tousled mane, goes on a strife

Seeking resort from the sullen caress!

Your willing soul be the sovereign.

Pity the dreary pause,

It whispered the measure

To distinguish love,

As woe or as treasure!

ইতি


Everything has lost its charm,

And winter, she said is approaching firm.

Frowning, she hinted at the east wind too

Look, it’s coming to get only you.

Like wind, now the air too, flows!

Picking ’em all that it throws.

Be it rain from the thundering clouds

Or seizing it as dew in a leaf’s shroud…

Their parents act so careless

Caressing them not even with a dress!

Yet, they braved to this moment

Picking dew and cold wind,

Shivering and at times, twined

Till it became unbearable a torment.

In a chorus, they welcomed her all,

Who knew, they just braved a fall?

A few stood fair, hard to tame

‘Blemish’, weren’t they, to her destitute’s frame?

And there, thralling us in enchantment,

Bedecked was winter’s unusual tent!

Alone bound in oneness,

Serenity excelled in her li’l vastness!

The essence in her nude scripture

Broke monotony of the verdant picture…

I gazed at the timeless canvas,

Winter came and left in a hush

Sleepless, waiting for her turn

Her absence was like an alien language,

I had to learn…

Of sleep and other things…!

She never gave them a miss,

Her life’s, of all turmoil, her only bliss,

Understands, does she herself even?

Afterall such Caprice

Seemingly tread all the way from heaven!

Lauds of ’em not many but one,

Mostly in time, that preceeds dawn,

Daring to ignore all that is annoy

In and out of it, she sleeps so coy!

An affair holds the moment in reins

Threading air with her book’s incense…

Recipe for the rage and likely things

Atop, stands tall, her ‘mood swings’!

‘Rather we!’

“Did you see the flying lanterns?”, I asked her. She paid no heed. I asked her again, this time a bit louder. She shrugged off. I stood up from my chair, faced her and holding her at her shoulder I shook her hard. I found a sudden change in her eyes. She seemed to have been suddenly catapulted to reality. 

“They are simply passing”, she replied reluctantly…
I was flabbergasted, not because of this utterly casual and carefree attitude of hers, but this time because I could trace one of them right across the black of her eyes. What added ornament to the moment was the glow in her eyes, which hardly woke up from what I always considered to be the murkiest and the most drab boring.
I could see the whole of the show right in her eyes, I didn’t need to venture for the sky at the back of my head. Till she pushed me aside with a hand of hers for she missed the show…
“These are all simply passing, then why do you even need to care for them?”

I enquired, only to encounter an even better silence of 30 seconds. She didn’t answer. She Clearly avoided my question pointing her fingers to her ears on either sides, and the bursting, loud crackers in the sky…
It was after quite a while of boredom that she finally managed to break the silence.

She placed her hand on mine lined on the arm-rest and said, “Why don’t you simply rest your lips and gaze at the night sky, in the way you taught me, in that way which is rightfully yours?” Now a bit exasperated she said, ” Why don’t you understand that I m trying to memorize all those ways, you taught!”.
She surprised me.
I certainly failed at being silent.

I pinged her again, a bit sheepishly this time,” You remember that?”

“Not exactly, but traces, that’s why I m trying to remember them, don’t you get?”, She replied firm.
“You know, I always regretted not being able to teach u that in person, and all I remember is scampering from the rooftop to the telephone every time I spotted one, ignoring everyone in my path.”, I told her, excited once again. I again started, ” You remember you were sick that day and couldn’t scale to the roof so I was kind of making a live commentary of sorts, till u finally managed to spoil it all. You asked me to call it a day for what I called love, and you, a mere emotional aberration.”, I said.
“I had to, it was leading us to nowhere, and I found it as a mere wastage of two years of my life. I was never having fun with you, though I somehow ended up being happy!”, She added.

“Isn’t that good?”, I asked. “No! I didn’t want to be bound with something as much confusing”, she shouted at my face.
It was pleasing to find how easily I calmed her still, just by wrapping my hand around her shoulders…
“Anyway, bunk that shit. I finally got a chance to teach something that’s rightfully mine, to someone I felt as much, such!”, I said.

She stayed on silent…

“So, you see that one approaching from the east? Doesn’t it look like an yellow firefly? And by the time I finished renaming it, see it’s big enough. Its coming to you… probably not to you in specific but towards you! And even if your life is complete without it, your eyes are insatiable enough to keep gazing on at it, and your mind directing your thoughts for it. None actually care, for if you care. They are bent upon to exercise themselves…they ask you to be judgemental, unlike your heart that only asks you to simply be mesmerized and feel it. That’s effortless you see.”
And I continued, “Once it’s right atop you, instead of soaking in the ethereal visual treat, you end up being keen to capture it in ur memories…which ultimately never happens. And once it’s beyond you, you just let it be! Did you ever interpret time that way?”
“No”, she said.
“Even time asks you to live the moment, not repent over it having passed or fear it approaching.”
“Think of you no,  I could never make you live the present or believe the happy past, and all that you could focus on was the approaching time and the misspelt words from past.”
I saw her sarcastic gaze soften.
She bursted out,” I don’t know the heck you are talking about!”
“For the first time I feared about future, about my mother, and it was true. I lost her in a few days. You never contacted me after that, nd you were untold.”, I said.
“I don’t have even a whisker of an idea of what you did after that, but as I said I kept on loving you to this date. See, you were 21 then, now you are 60. I don’t know what will happen tomorrow. But I  remember all that was happiness between us. See I won. I still have the quirky, smartass, sarcastic, 21 year old I loved, and you have a 60 year old hapless fellow, reminiscing his past…!”, I said, the joy of being victorious stamped on to my face.
Tears welled up in her eyes. A few of those drops trickling past her cheek glistened in the halo of the led lights in the fore…
“Don’t cry”, I said, wiping the tears with my own fingers. I had been touching her in years and evidently felt the wrinkle marks that were once drest in utter fluffiness. “There’s only one thing i never celebrated with you, I guess it’s time now. Wait a minute.”,I stood up saying and left.
“Whoa! A flying lantern! For me?”, She asked.

“No, for us, it’s Diwali afterall. Come-on hold it on that side like this and let me light it up.”, I said.

We sat down on our respective seats, she snuggled into my arms just as she did at the movie-theatres. We spent the whole night watching the dark sky, through smoky filter. It felt good.
“Thank you, for again letting me have fun again!”, She whispered to my ears.
Patting at the back of her head, I said, ” But I felt that I was happy ‘rather we’!”

Somewhere dead in the night we fell asleep. As I woke up I found her crying over me, a few people surrounding us. She had the same lantern in her hand coz before letting it into the wilderness of the night sky I tied it to a long string, written in it was “I will always love you!”, ‘extinguished’.
Wait, who was telling the story then?
~shubham,kali pujo’16

Coy, monotony!

With woe, morphed into joy,

On tonight’s blissful ploy;

And the verse of eternity

In an ominous empathy, play coy!

Stitching the midnight facade

Of unseen, wanton await,

Brings forth immaculate framed,

As decor on a destitute’s gait.

With the scent from distance

Decking the air, crisp

My heart dances to trance,

Matching feet on a whimsy trip!

Words frenzy a rhyme,

Rhythm setting leaves on rustle,

As careless plays time,

Cruising to destiny in a hustle!

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